I will be writing a series of articles about our negative perception in regards to depression.
For today, I’d like to talk about how many of us are afraid of depression. Why wouldn’t be afraid when society shames it and makes it wrong? All of us want to be loved and accepted, it is more than normal to feel frightened when we see a threat to our basic needs of love.
Every now and then I go through few days of depression. Sometimes I want to do everything possible to escape this dark feeling, other times I am comfortable sitting with it and I truly listen to what this teacher has to say to me.
However, I realized lately that one of the main ways to start healing this frightened part of me is to simply look at depression and change my perception of it.
What if depression was not a demon but a friend?
The first belief that I have seen in myself and in everyone around me is:
Depression makes us look weak.
Let’s debunk this belief together.
If it is true that depression makes us weak then it is only natural for us to want to hide it. First, because we want to protect ourselves from any attacks and second because we still want to be loved – it is our basic needs.
What happens when we think that depression makes us weak?
1- We feel sorry for ourselves
2- We treat ourselves as if there is something wrong with us
3- We become needy because we think we are weak
4- We also over compensate and people please because we want to earn love and acceptance
5- Instead of listening to what depression is trying to tell us, we try to kill it and not learn from it
6- We feel ashamed
7- Because we believe something is wrong with us then when others go through the same we treat them as if there is something wrong with them. Instead of being present, compassionate and kind…. we become people who want to fix others.
How do we treat depression when we believe it makes us weak?
1- We give it complete power. We become slaves.
2- We don’t question our lives, our thoughts and the situation
3- We believe everything it has to say about us so we become close minded because we are not willing to see the other side of the coin
4- We argue with it (reality) instead of giving it what it needs: love and acceptance
5- it is UNnatural to NOT BE depressed when we are going through loss….whether it was small or big
WHAT IF WE THINK THAT……..DEPRESSION MAKES US LOOK STRONG….. THEN HOW WOULD OUR LIVES CHANGE THEN? (Take a moment to reflect on a situation of someone you know)
1- It takes SO MUCH courage to sit with intense feelings
2- Depression makes people SO much kinder, sensitive and empathetic towards people, animals and the planet because they know how it feels like to be in pain
3- Depression helps people have so much depth. They know so much about human nature and life
4- Depression helps people know themselves inside-out
5- Depression makes people empathetic and love to serve
6- Depression helps people discover new things about themselves and life
7- Depression teaches us patience …..A LOT OF IT!
So…..what kind of people do we become when we accept depression and when we start believing that depression makes us look strong?
WE STOP TRYING TO FIX OURSELVES AND OTHERS….we stop HIDING AND FEELING SHAME…… Instead we become….PATIENT, KIND, COMPASSIONATE, COURAGEOUS, EMPOWERED AND EMPOWERING, DEEP, EMPATHETIC, HELPFUL and LOVING.
Now tell me…who doesn’t want to be around someone with those qualities?
I Find this to be so empowering and beautiful….what about you? Do you still feel like you want to run away from depression? What are you willing to do to shift your perception about your depression?
P.S: I am writing this with one finger on my phone while holding my daughter. Please excuse any typos. ❤